I'm really into asian looking animals
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
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