Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Four minutes until I can fart!
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
