there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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