Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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