redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
