All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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