I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
