You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
