he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
