the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
