She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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