Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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