roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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