My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
so let's talk penis.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
This is the high leading the old right now
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
