just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
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