nut hugger
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
