I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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