He told me they were just razor bumps!
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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