But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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