my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
