1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Randomize
