I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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