It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
