i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
