If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize
