Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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