well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
