I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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