Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
