Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
