That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
