Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
