i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
