My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
