I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
