Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
