Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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