So drunk, too bad you don't want this
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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