Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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