I could have mohawked her pubes.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
you never un-have a 4some
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
