You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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