My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Four minutes until I can fart!
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
