Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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