mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
