Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize
