Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Randomize
