Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize