The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I think your dad took our porno
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
