Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
