So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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